We are just 10 weeks away from Christmas, which should be a time of making memories and connecting with friends and family. Unfortunately, for many it becomes a time of stress and anxiety, especially due to the financial strain that you allow it to become.

My suggestion is to look honestly at your situation and to decide how you want to spend Christmas – not just on how much you want to spend on Christmas. Your time and effort should be spent creating traditions and arranging to enjoy this season as much as possible. You could also challenge yourself and your family to do activities that is low-cost or free. It’s easy to spend money – it takes more thought and consideration to plan experiences.

With young children I saw a great 4-gift rule. It is basically

-1 present for something they need

-1 present for something they want

-1 present to wear

-1 present to read.

That seems like wonderful advice.

(Thanks to Lesly, one of my followers for sharing that)

For older families as they grow and have families of their own, it becomes more of a challenge. In our family, with four adult children and spouses we are starting a new tradition of a “Secret Santa”. Everyone’s name goes in to a hat and each of us draws just one name. We then purchase just this one present at a value not to exceed $60.00. Of course, grandchildren are excluded from this at least in our case. Additionally if a spouse wants to get presents for their immediate family, that is their choice and something they decide themselves.

The good thing about this system is that siblings don’t stress over what to get their siblings, or parents, etc. They know they only have to buy one present, and therefore can take more time and effort to choose it. We also encourage and welcome re-gifting!

I look forward to the holiday season with great anticipation each year. For me, I love to drag out my old tacky sweaters, the hand-made ornaments that the kids made decades ago, cover our home with crass decorations and crank up the Christmas carols. We make sure to take in a number of live Christmas events and current Christmas movies. This includes driving around and checking out the festive lights.

Our four days of “family” Christmas are spent with pot-luck dinners, lots of laughs and traditions such as watching Christmas Vacation on Christmas Eve. For over 30 years I have been making a Christmas cinnamon bun tree for breakfast (yes, I confess out of Pillsbury package)…which takes no time, costs very little, but still means so much to all of us, if only to remind us that some things never change.

We do not spend much money on buying things, since I’m a firm non-consumer and prefer doing things than having things. We do donate and give of our time to the Food Bank and other important charities at this time of year.

Before you let Christmas sneak up on you, take some time to discuss with your significant other and your family how you want to remember this Christmas. Set some boundaries and some goals for making this the most special holiday season you’ve ever had.

Until next week….."Many of us spend half our time wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing."

-- Alexander Woollcott, Critic and Commentator for The New Yorker magazine.

The very first step in becoming financially fit is to keep track of your income and your expenses. It sounds basic and easy – and fortunately it is.

This process is now significantly easier than it used to be. We have the advantage of using computers, which enables us to input data and then have the computer programs do all the calculations for us.

I have also made it easy for you by including spreadsheets on www.financialfitnessbooks.com that you can use to plug in your own data and numbers. For a full explanation on how to insert your numbers and to track your finances, please refer to page 23 in Financial Fitness for Beginners.

Your exercise is to get yourself a little notebook that you carry with you at all times. When you purchase anything, keep the receipt and write on the back of it to identify what the expense was for. For any small cash expenses that do not have a receipt, such as coffee or vending machine purchases, simply write the expense down in your notebook. Make it a new habit to use your ATM card as often as possible, rather than cash, as this provides a backup system for recording your expenses.

The first time you complete the Tracking Spreadsheet provided on my webpage will be the most time-consuming because you have to input your income categories and the expense categories that are specific to your spending habits.

By recording all your expenses you will fully understand where you spend your money. There may be areas that you want to cut back on and also areas that you wish to spend more of your hard-earned money on.

Similar to a weight loss program where you are required to record everything you eat and what exercises you have done, with consistent financial tracking you are more apt to be conscious of your daily habits. By recording your income and expenses, you cannot be in denial or kid yourself about what you are really spending your money on. The truth is in black and white.

Many financial experts recommend that you go back and record your spending over the last few months or years. I prefer to suggest that you just start now. Wherever you were in the past is long over. You are starting fresh from today and looking forward, not backward.

Until next week…."If you want more, you have to require more from yourself."

-- Dr Phil, Motivational Author and Talk Show Host

P.S. Wishing my Canadian family and friends a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend.

P.S.S. In appreciation of Thanksgiving, for this week, I am running a promotional special on my book to allow you to share it with those you know would benefit from it. Buy 3 books and pay for only two. ($47.98) A savings of $21.00. Buy 5 books and pay for only three. ($70.97)  A savings of $44.00.

All too often we don’t get or have what we want because we don’t ask the right question, which is “How Can I”. Instead we focus on why it isn’t possible and all the obstacles to achieving the goal. If only we spent 10% as much time on how we could do it or have it, the outcomes would be totally different.

A good financial fitness exercise is to practice asking yourself “How Can I” for any goal you want to accomplish. Even when you think there is no possibility, focus instead on how you could do it or have it. The exercise is to come up with at least three answers to that question no matter how absurd they might seem. For more inspiration refer to Chapter One in Financial Fitness Books for beginners.

This life-skill of asking “How Can I” provides food for thought and develops the new muscle of success. This works for every aspect of your life. For instance, let’s say you would like to spend an evening a week with just your spouse, but you have three kids and can’t afford a babysitter or any extra money to go out for dinner.

Up to now you may have simply given up on this possibility. You may even complain about the situation (which doesn’t help), you may feel that it isn’t fair and start to resent your spouse because of it. A healthier and more satisfying way to spend your energy is to:

Ask yourself “How can I”

-Do a babysitting swap with a girlfriend one night a week and go out for a picnic.

-Think of all the fun activities you and your spouse could do that doesn’t cost you any money and put those suggestions in a jar. Each week on your night out, pull out an idea and do it, such as go for a walk in the park, lock yourself in your bedroom while the babysitter looks after the kids, etc.

-Have the kids go to a swap babysitter and have a nice evening in with a simple or elaborate dinner followed by cards, a board game, and a movie or simply talking and enjoying one another.

Now, it is very likely that your conditioned mind, might automatically default to objections to these suggestions. We don’t have anyone we could swap babysitting with. We don’t have a nice park nearby. We can’t afford the gas to go anywhere. Going on a picnic would be boring, etc, etc. You get my point. It truly is amazing how quickly we can be negative.

The idea of coming up with three ideas is that it starts you thinking and from these ideas you may be able to expand on them and come up with concrete answers. If the obstacle is not having a babysitter to swap with, don’t let that stop you. Rather than swap babysitting services, get a babysitter in exchange for something else you could offer such as help with a website, cleaning help, etc. Lots of people are interested in trading their skills and services rather than paying for them. Be creative and be solutions orientated, rather than negative. Begin creating a new life for yourself today and strengthen your “How Can I” muscle on just one problem at a time and you will be well rewarded for your efforts. 

Becoming financially free is simple but not easy. Why? Because it requires focus, discipline, and commitment. Many people rob themselves of their tomorrows because they are so greedy for today. This blog is offering some tough love because this week, I had two different people, very near and dear to me who expected my blessing when they justified breaking one of the fundamental laws of financial freedom.

Financial freedom is truly easy because all you need to do is save 10% of what you make. Not sometimes, or when you feel like it, or if things were different, but always! This is called paying yourself first. With this 10% you save it and NEVER use it, except for investment purposes. In other words, it is what you use to make more money with. In this way you create a golden goose that will provide an income to you without you having to physically work for it.

If you simply save $7.00 a day (at 8% interest) when you are twenty, thanks to the power of compound interest, you will have almost 1,000,000 when you are 65. For more examples of compound interest and to motivate you to start saving consistently today if you haven’t already, check out Chapter Ten (Pay Yourself First) in Financial Fitness for Beginners.

Oh, but if it is truly that easy, why isn’t everyone a millionaire at 65? The catch is that only you can do it for yourself – just like getting in shape – you have to be the one to diet or exercise (or both). You can’t do it once in a while, when you are in the mood or if the stars are lined up exactly right. There is no doubt about it, saving money on a regular and consistent basis requires discipline. You can make it easier on yourself by having this 10% automatically deposited to an investment account, so you are not as tempted to spend it first.

That brings us to the second challenge. Temptation. Once you have some money saved up, it becomes very tempting to use this money for things other than its intended purpose of becoming your golden goose. It is easy for you to justify why you should take it out and spend it on something other than an investment. It is for something very important. It can’t wait. It makes more sense to spend the money now, rather than a few months down the road. Then just to convince yourself that your decision to use the money is in fact the right one, you put the icing on the cake. “I am just borrowing it. I will put it back in”. That’s a good one! If you do, you’ll be one in a million who actually does it. (Oh yes, I forgot…you actually really, really mean it).

If you are tempted to steal from yourself, ask yourself this question first. Have you already stolen money from your financial freedom account in the past and not paid it back to yourself? Hmmmmm…..and you are thinking of doing it again...but this time it will be different, right? By repeating your bad habits, the one difference is that each time you justify “borrowing” your money, know that the day will come when that option won’t be left to you because you have stolen it all and your “plan” to pay it back somehow never seemed to happen. All you need to do to confirm this vicious cycle is to look around and see how many 65 year olds do not have $1,000,000 in their bank account. It has nothing to do with not making enough money. For many it is a lack of financial education and understanding. Once you have this knowledge (which again is as easy as reading Financial Fitness Books), any failure to achieve financial freedom is the result of not having enough discipline. Harsh, but true.

You need to live your life on the remaining 90% of your income. From this, you save for purchases that you want to make. Your financial fitness account is not an ATM. If you are impatient for something that you want to buy or have, instead of taking the easy way and hacking away at your golden goose, consider other options. Work for it! Reduce your spending in other areas. In other words earn the money you want. This may require waiting for it, but in the long run your discipline to forego immediate gratification will develop strong financial fitness muscles that will keep you strong enough to avoid the temptation of stealing from yourself today or in the future.

Until next week.....

"Sometimes the best helping hand you can get is a good, firm push."

-- Joann Thomas